I am fuming. Totally beside myself. It’s 11:30 pm and I am so emotionally scarred from this evening’s events that I can’t even THINK about trying to go to sleep. I should probably do some kind of meditation or something, but I’m too raging mad. I couldn’t even think of a good title for this post. Why am I so angry? You have the audacity to ask me WHY?!? I’ll tell you why: Blow Out, that’s why.
Now none of you have probably seen this movie. It was released in 1981 and stars a strapping young John Travolta. And before you read any further, I must warn you that there will be spoilers in this blog post, as in I’m going to tell you the ending. But I don’t care, because this movie can suck it after what it just did to me.
Let me give you a brief rundown: John Travolta plays a sound man, as in a person whose profession it is to record and insert sound effects into movies. By accident he records a presidential candidate’s assassination. Everyone is trying to cover it up, and he spends an hour and a half in movie time trying to prove there’s a conspiracy. There’s a girl involved who, as you can probably guess, he has a thing for.
So jump to the end—the guy who murdered the presidential candidate poses as a journalist so he can get a hold of the tape that proves he’s guilty. The girl delivers the tape to him, there’s a 15-minute sequence where psycho guy is getting around to murdering her, during which this entire time John Travolta is trying to find them in the middle of a parade.
The tension is building and building and I swear I can’t even take it anymore. I ask my husband, “Please! Tell me that she’s going to be okay! Or I can’t go through with watching this!” He tells me he can’t promise me this. I curl up into a fetal position, slap my hands onto my cheeks and peer at the screen through terrified, squinted eyes.
The tension builds some more. There are loud fireworks involved. Finally, FINALLY, John Travolta finds psycho guy and the girl. I swear I’m going to DIE if he doesn’t save her in time. He runs over to them and just in the nick of time grabs hold of psycho guy’s ice pick before he stabs the girl. In slow mo, he pushes psycho guy aside and sees that—OMG I’M DYING—the girl is already dead, having been strangled by some super thin string attached to psycho guy’s watch.
WHAT?!? This can’t be! No, it’s some kind of mistake! But then—the movie ends! The conspiracy is never brought to light and the girl is dead!
I just don’t know what to do with myself. I realize I may have gotten a little too emotionally involved in all this, but it’s not my fault. It’s JOHN TRAVOLTA’S FAULT. He should have done CPR on her or something. I mean, come on, DO SOMETHING, man. The only redeeming part is that the psycho guy was played by John Lithgow. And I must keep reminding myself: WHO DOESN’T LIKE THEM SOME JOHN LITHGOW?
Please forgive my overuse of capitals. I am not myself right now. But it does feel better to get it all off my chest.
Images from Aveleyman.