The most insane thing happened this past weekend. This:
It’s a broken plate (with honey and a shelled pistachio on it). Yeah. But do you even KNOW how that happened?!?
My head. That’s what happened.
Yeah, I broke a plate right down the middle USING MY HEAD.
No, I wasn’t training for some black belt karate competition. Here is how it went down:
I was bending down to pick up an orange peel or something that had fallen on the kitchen floor. Little did I know that my kid was bringing his used breakfast dish to the sink and, at the very moment that I popped back up, the plate was directly over my head. So I swung my head back up and BAM — the plate split in half.
I was all, “OMG! I can’t believe you just broke a plate over my head!” and my kid is all, “OMG! Are you all right?!?” not knowing if he should cry or burst out laughing because it was totally ridiculous.
My husband was at work at the time, of course, and I texted him the following:
Kid #2 just literally broke a plate over my head. I feel a little dizzy.
And…there’s no response on his end.
A few minutes later, I texted him the above photo with the caption: Seriously. Plate. Over my head. And there’s silence on your end?
FINALLY he texts back and asks me (1) if I’m okay, and (2) if kid #2 did it on purpose.
Me: “Yes. No. I feel a little off.”
His response: “You are always a little off.”
Nice. It was a craptastic morning. But on the up side, every time my kid asked me if he earned screen time yet for the day, I said, “You broke a PLATE over my head! What do you think?!?” It was hilarious.