It’s the most dangerous time of the year

Halloween has come and gone. The kids are back at school. Their overflowing bags of Halloween candy are not. They are sitting here all day, with me, in the house. And that’s a dangerous combination.

This is something how it goes in my brain:

Oh! Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups! My favorite! I’ll just have one. OMG, that was amazing. It can’t hurt to have one more. I mean, they’re SNACK size. And this is my snack.

(Two hours later) It’s been two whole hours and I haven’t had any more peanut butter cups. Go me! I think I’ll reward myself with another one.

(Later that night) ONE more peanut butter cup surely won’t make a difference. I’ll just grab one more teensy weeny one. (Desperately rummaging through the bag) Oh no! There are no more. Let me attack Kid #2’s bag. He’ll never know. (Finding one) Victory is mine!

(The next day) No more peanut butter cups. I guess I’ll move on to Mounds.

(Later that day) No more Mounds. I guess I’ll move onto Snickers. What the heck? Fun-size Snickers are now BITE size Snickers?!? That’s crazy. I need to eat at least three to equal the old Fun Size.

(The next day) Ugh. I guess I have no other choice but to eat a stupid Nestle Crunch. It’ll do in a pinch.

(By the end of the week) I HATE these Tootsie Rolls. But I’ve eaten everything else. Ugh. I’ll hate every bite. But I have to do it because my body needs candy. Going. Through. Withdrawal.

I think somebody needs to offer me that Switch Witch thing. I might trade all my kids’ candy for a sweater or something. Maybe.



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